Look what the homosexuals have done to me! You can't just comb that out and reset it? OH MY GOD, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE… sale. Oh, the burning! ♪♪ Amaaaaaaziiiing Graaaace ♪♪

You might wanna lean away from that fire since you're soaked in alcohol. Sweet old thing. Only two of those words describe Mom, so I know you're lying to me. There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. I've always been deeply passionate about nature. Perhaps you remember Neuterfest? But I didn't take wasn't optimistic it could be done for an answer. You might wanna lean away from that fire since you're soaked in alcohol. Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite… like my heart is getting hard. Well, yeah you've gotta lock that down.

"Circumvent." It means "to go around." Gob: The old "reach around." I run a pretty tight ship around here. With a pool table. If this were a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie, this would be our act break. But it wasn't. Mister gay is bleeding! Mister gay! It walked on my pillow!

Well, I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts. Taste the happy, Michael. Taste it. It tastes kind of like sad. Of course. The "Bob Loblaw Law Blog." Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful!

Oh, yes, there absolutely will be a margarita made in my mouth. Yo quiero leche. Yo quiero leche de madre. The CIA should've just Googled for his hideout, evidently. Sorry, some of my students are arguing the significance of the shankbone on the seder plate. But we do not - NOT wag our genitals at one another to make a point. I was set up. By the Brits. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C. How am I supposed to find someone willing to go into that musty old claptrap? You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard.

I'm going to buy you the single healthiest call girl this town has ever seen. It's as Ann as the nose on plain's face. We need a name. Maybe 'Operation Hot Mother'. So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary, and we don't need anymore lawsuits. I was once called the worst audience participant Cirque du Soleil ever had. My brother wasn't optimistic it could be done, but I didn't take "wasn't optimistic it could be done" for an answer.

When a man needs to prove to a woman that he's actually… When a man loves a woman… You boys know how to shovel coal? What do you expect, Mother? I'm half machine! I'm a monster!! No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. That coat costs more than your house!

I should be in this Poof. She's always got to wedge herself in the middle of us so that she can control everything. Yeah. Mom's awesome. Hair up, glasses off. Those are balls.

I mean, it's one banana, Michael. What could it cost, ten dollars? And here you are coming out of your mother's third base! She's always got to wedge herself in the middle of us so that she can control everything. Yeah. Mom's awesome. I want to cry so bad, but I don't think I can spare the moisture. Wow, this is the best free scrapbooking class I've ever taken! ps This one really cracks me up for some reason. Oh…yeah…the guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on! I'm sure Egg is a great person.

You can always tell a Milford man. However, she mistook the drowsy eye alcohol warning for a winking eye alcohol suggestion. What about macaroni – let me finish – salad?