A flower in my garden, a mystery in my panties. Interfere? I ought to pull down your pants and spank your ass raw. Michael: I'm sorry, have we met? Mr. Zuckerkorn, you've been warned about touching. You said spanking. One of the guys told me to take my head out of my BOTTOM and get back to work…my BOTTOM!
Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass. What's up, fizz-ellas. Caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw. Probably out there without a flipper, swimming around in a circle, freaking out his whole family.
I'm sure Egg is a great person. Don't leave your Uncle T-bag hanging. Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite… like my heart is getting hard. So you take your mom to work every day? Bummer. Moms are such a pain in the ass, huh? It's, like, die already! If you didn't have adult onset diabetes, I wouldn't mind giving you a little sugar. I am having a love affair with this ice cream sandwich. No, I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being WITH you.
It's a jetpack, Michael. What could possibly go wrong? And guess what else is back. [slow wink] My breakfast? My friskiness. Mama horny Michael. What is she doing at a beauty pageant? Is she running the lights or something? Let me give that oatmeal some brown sugar. I shall hide behind the couch. (Guy's a pro.) I didn't mean who… I meant… her? Could it be love? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard. This is not what it looks like. It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence.
Mom… after all these years, God's not going to take a call from you. When a.. man.. needs to prove to a woman that he's actually.. [pause].. When a man loves a woman.. George Bush doesn't care about black puppets. I deceived you, mom. Tricked makes it sound like we have a playful relationship. Way to plant, Ann! What do you think about Sudden Valley? It sounds like a salad dressing, but for some reason I don't want to eat it. We need a name. Maybe "Operation Hot Mother." No, let's try to top that. (They never did.)
He's a regular Freddie Wilson, that one. Ah, it is a rock, though. Should beat everything. Gob: There's not a lot of logic to it. Obviously this blue part here is the land. The CIA should've just Googled for his hideout, evidently. No! These are just strippers! Look how hot they are! Touché, Pandora.
See for more good stuff. I'm not interested in you that way. Tobias: What way? Michael: Pick one.
Let me take off my assistant's skirt and put on my Barbra-Streisand-in-The-Prince-of-Tides ass-masking therapist pantsuit. A sea of waiters and no one will take a drink order. Are you at all concerned about an uprising? You don't want a hungry dove down your pants. She's not that Mexican, Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Columbian or something. If I make this comeback, I'll buy you a hundred George Michaels that you can teach to drive! Oh by the way, Doctor said no kissing her on the face for one week. I was like make it two weeks, see if I care! Don't ask "Can I"… ask "I Can!"
What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese? Hahahahah! How could I say no to the woman who gave me chlamydia? Hey, it was one night of wild passion! Michael: And yet you didn't notice her body? Gob: I like to look in the mirror. I was set up. By the Brits. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C. We'll have to find something to do so that people can look at you without wanting to kill themselves. Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around. Here he comes. Here comes John Wayne.
It feels good to be back in a queen! He also said some things African American-y wasn't ready to hear.