Oh, like when they say "poofter" to mean "tourist", yes. She tried pesto for the first time. Imagine that, 92 years old and she never tried pesto. If you're suggesting I play favorites, you're wrong. I love all of my children equally. I don't care for Gob. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass! Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass! I believe you will find the dessert to be both engrossing and high-grossing! So we don't get dessert? Nellie is blowing them all AWAY. Well, if you want to play Eve, you got to get in line behind what, above five homos.

Am I in two thirds of a hospital room? I'm gonna go get sexy. There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town. Well, that certainly leaves me out. I will be a bigger and hairier mole than the one on your inner left thigh!

How do you know Steve Holt? Are you in AA? Did you know that more frozen bananas are sold right here on this boardwalk than anywhere in the OC? Everything they do is so dramatic and flamboyant. It just makes me want to set myself on fire. Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce. I should be in this Poof.

In the mid '90s, Tobias formed a folk music band with Lindsay and Maebe which he called Dr. Funke's 100 Percent Natural Good Time Family Band Solution. The group was underwritten by the Natural Food Life Company, a division of Chem-Grow, an Allen Crayne acqusition, which was part of the Squimm Group. Their motto was simple: We keep you alive. She's not 'that Mexican', Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. Tobias is Queen Mary. You want to have some guy reach around you in the middle of the night, start messing with your junk?

No one's called him Baby Buster since high school. I'm not a prostitute. Then I shall let you live! I am having a love affair with this ice cream sandwich. A night of heterosexual intercourse.

Yes, she happens to be more experienced than a normal girl, but sometimes love should be… terrifying. He also said some things African American-y wasn't ready to hear. Everybody dance NOW. GENE!! [screams] Tobias Fünke costume. Oh…yeah…the guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on! Excuse me while I circumvent you. The old reach-around.

She's a contestant. It's sorta like an inner beauty pageant. Ah, there it is. It's a jetpack, Michael. What could go wrong? Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar. Are you aware of this? Coming soon. Indeed. Even it means me taking a chubby… I will suck it up. You're losing blood, aren't you? Gob: Probably, my socks are wet.

Yeah, like I'm going to spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit? Come on! Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. Absolutely. And we're going to be here every day. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. I hear the jury's still out on science. I run a pretty tight ship around here. With a pool table.

I think that's one of Mom's little fibs, you know, like I'll sacrifice anything for my children. A group of British builders operating outside the O.C. I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time.

We'll have to find something to do so that people can look at you without wanting to kill themselves. Speaking of settling, how's Ann? Oh…yeah…the guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on! But I did finally get into Dad's pants. Although I had to have the crotch taken in a little bit. No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough.