There's a girl in my soup! Oh, I can just taste those meaty leading man parts in my mouth. You're losing blood, aren't you? Probably, my socks are wet. A million [bleep]ing diamonds! Well, if you want to play Eve, you got to get in line behind what, above five homos. There are dozens of us! Dozens!

Let me take off my assistant's skirt and put on my Barbra-Streisand-in-The-Prince-of-Tides ass-masking therapist pantsuit. Everyone's laughing, and riding, and cornholing except Buster. O-kay, who'd like a banger in the mouth?

A million ****ing diamonds! I [bleeped] the business model. Yeah, she had all kinds of orgasms. No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. Yes, Annyong. Your name is Annyong! We all know you're Annyong!

Did you enjoy your lunch, mom? You drank it fast enough. Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar. Yeah, well, have you seen the new Mustang? You could hump that hood. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass! OH MY GOD, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE… sale. Oh, the burning! ♪♪ Amaaaaaaziiiing Graaaace ♪♪ A trick is something a whore does for money…or candy. … or cocaine. Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce.

What about macaroni – let me finish – salad? I've got a nice hard cot with his name on it. You'd do that to your own brother? I said "cot." Aren't you the sweetest thing, spending time with what's left of your uncle. It's a wonderful restaurant!

It seems like only yesterday you were bursting forth from your mother's fertile womb. Let me out that Queen. She wanted to look 48. I nearly airbrushed her into oblivion. Ended up checking "albino" on the form. Stop licking my hand, you horse's ass.

No one was making fun of Andy Griffith. I can't emphasize that enough. Go ahead, touch the Cornballer. It walked on my pillow! Well excuse me, Judge Reinhold! ♪♪ And the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting. Sky rockets in flight! Afternoon delight! ♪♪

Am I in two thirds of a hospital room? Michael, look, this has got to stop. I mean, flattered? Yes. Interested? Not tonight. I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands. Hola, is Rosa still alive? No? Well this is not my day. I'm sure Egg is a great person. Please refrain from discussing or engaging in any sort of interoffice [bleep] or [bleep] or finger[bleep] or [bleep]sting or [bleep] or even [bleep]. Buster, what are you doing with mother's rape horn? Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk!

Yes, Annyong. Your name is Annyong! We all know you're Annyong! Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot… your wife is dead! Don't call my escorts whores. I'll have a vodka rocks. (Mom, it's breakfast time.) And a piece of toast. I need a fake passport, preferably to France…I like the way they think.

You're Killing Me, Buster. We'll have to find something to do so that people can look at you without wanting to kill themselves. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a…she's the belle of the ball! After all, why should you go to jail for a crime somebody else noticed? The worst that could happen is that I could spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit. COME ON.