Perhaps an attic shall I seek. You stay on top of her, Buddy. Don't be afraid to ride her. Hard. Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk! If that man's straight, then I am sober.

A trick is something a whore does for money… or cocaine. I'm not a prostitute. Michael: Then I shall let you live! ¡Soy loco por los Cornballs!

I made a huge tiny mistake. What, so the guy we are meeting with can't even grow his own hair? COME ON!

I'm a complete failure. I can't even fake the death of a stripper. Let me out that Queen. Wow, this is the best free scrapbooking class I've ever taken! ps This one really cracks me up for some reason. I know, I just call her Annabelle cause she's shaped like a… she's the belle of the ball!

A million [bleep]ing diamonds! Popcorn shrimp… with club sauce.

The only thing I found in the fridge was a dead dove in a bag. Gob: You didn't eat that, did you? What's next, Michael? Are you going to make dancing illegal? Is this the tiny town from Footloose? But where did the lighter fluid come from? Mission Accomplished. Douche chill! Michael, I'm your older brother. I'll never be proud of you. Waiting for the Emmys. BTW did you know won 6 Emmys and was still canceled early by Fox? COME ON. Yeah, like I'm going to take a whiz through this $5,000 suit. COME ON.

Here he comes. Here comes John Wayne. I don't want no part of yo' tight-ass country club, ya freak bitch! Suddenly playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit? Those are balls.

I guess you can say I'm buy-curious. I shall hide behind the couch. (Guy's a pro.) Absolutely. And we're going to be here every day. I don't care if it takes from now till the end of Shrimpfest. Let me give that oatmeal some brown sugar. Why are you squeezing me with your body? It's a hug, Michael. I'm hugging you. Hey, it was one night of wild passion! And yet you didn't notice her body? I like to look in the mirror. Michael, look, this has got to stop. I mean, flattered? Yes. Interested? Not tonight.

The guy runs a prison, he can have any piece of ass he wants. So did you see the new Poof? His name's Gary, and we don't need anymore lawsuits. Turns out he ended up getting too friendly with the teddy bear. Everyone's laughing, and riding, and cornholing except Buster. Oh by the way, Doctor said no kissing her on the face for one week. I was like make it two weeks, see if I care! Everybody dance NOW.

It seems like only yesterday you were bursting forth from your mother's fertile womb. They don't appreciate him. It's his glasses… they make him look like a lizard. Plus he's self-conscious.